How Mindfulness Can Transform Addiction to Social Media, News, or Other Substances
Essential mindfulness skills to meet discomfort instead of consuming it away
In the feedback forms from our Sama Life Circles, one question keeps appearing: "Can mindfulness help with addiction?" Sometimes it's about substances. Sometimes it's about scrolling. Sometimes it's about patterns we can't seem to break even when we know they're hurting us.
My Mindful Marketing students at Isenberg School of Management recently tracked their social media use for five days. Their unfiltered journal entries revealed something that mirrors what I see in all our struggles with addiction—whether digital or chemical. They wrote:
"I spent time watching videos that weren't even funny or entertaining"
"I kept scrolling despite not enjoying it"
"I knew I should stop but kept going back"
"I felt trapped by my phone"
This is the face of modern addiction—conscious yet compulsive behavior. We're awake to what's happening but feel powerless to change it.
What Our Addictions Have in Common
Whether it's cigarettes, donuts, Instagram, news feeds, or TikTok, our addictions work the same way. They promise relief from discomfort. They offer escape from boredom, anxiety, loneliness, or that vague sense that something's not right.
But here's what I've learned from working with hundreds of people, from teaching students who can't stop scrolling, and from my own journey: every thing we use to avoid discomfort eventually becomes the source of more discomfort.
My students documented this perfectly—they weren't even enjoying their scrolling, yet they couldn't stop. Just like someone lighting another cigarette or checking the news "one more time" at 2 AM, they kept consuming despite the lack of reward.
The cruel irony is that excessive consumption doesn't just fail to solve our original discomfort—it creates new problems. We end up feeling guilty about the time wasted, sleep-deprived from late-night scrolling, and further behind on what we actually needed to do. The very behavior we used to escape stress becomes a source of additional stress.
Understanding the Psychology Behind Our Urges
Our relationship with substances, social media, and news isn't random—it follows predictable patterns that neuroscientists and psychologists have mapped. At the core is what researchers call the "habit loop," first popularized by Charles Duhigg (2012) in "The Power of Habit" but rooted in decades of behavioral psychology research.
The habit loop works like this: something in our environment triggers us (a notification, feeling stressed, seeing others smoke), we perform an automatic behavior (scroll, use, consume), and we receive a reward (distraction, relief, stimulation).
B.F. Skinner's operant conditioning research from the 1950s showed how behaviors followed by rewards get strengthened over time. What makes modern addictions particularly insidious is what's called "intermittent variable reinforcement"—we never know when we'll get the "reward" of an interesting post or the perfect high, which paradoxically makes the behavior more addictive (Skinner, 1953).
My students discovered this firsthand. Boredom (cue) triggered phone-checking (behavior) seeking stimulation (reward). Even when the reward rarely came—they wrote about watching videos that weren't even entertaining—the possibility kept them hooked. Their—our—brains have learned: discomfort = reach for comforting behavior.
Mindfulness Skills to Meet Discomfort
Here I discuss five mindfulness skills that can help us meet our addictions without giving in to them—awareness, curiosity, compassion, energy, and appreciative joy.
Awareness: Surfing the Waves of Urge
The concept of "urge surfing" was developed by psychologist Alan Marlatt and his colleagues in the 1980s as part of Mindfulness-Based Relapse Prevention (Marlatt & Gordon, 1985). They discovered something revolutionary: we don't have to fight cravings or give in to them. We can learn to observe them like surfers watching waves.
Marlatt's insight came from combining Western psychology with Buddhist mindfulness practices. Jon Kabat-Zinn had just introduced Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction in 1979, and Marlatt saw how these principles could transform addiction treatment (Bowen, Chawla, & Marlatt, 2011).
As we discussed in our last Sama Life Circle, all phenomena are impermanent—including our cravings. Sarah Bowen and colleagues (2009) demonstrated that when people practiced urge surfing, they didn't necessarily have fewer cravings initially, but they changed their relationship to them. The cravings lost their power.
The practice is simple but profound:
Notice the urge as a physical sensation, without judgment
Observe it like a wave that rises, crests, and naturally falls
Use your breath as an anchor while the wave passes through
For my students, I offered my "Return, Listen, Begin" framework—a simplified approach to the same principle. Return to the present moment, listen to what you really need, and begin to meet that need intentionally.
Curiosity: The Discovery That Changes Everything
Dr. Judson Brewer's research on addiction shows that curiosity is more powerful than willpower. His brain imaging studies reveal that when we approach our cravings with genuine curiosity rather than resistance, the parts of the brain associated with craving actually calm down.
Here's what curiosity can reveal: When we're truly present with our consumption—without trying to resist or give in—we often discover we don't even enjoy it. When we really taste the cigarette, inhale the smoke, feel it moving into our lungs without judgment, we might discover we don't actually enjoy it—we're doing it to destress.
I experienced this with donuts. I would eat them so quickly when stressed, before I had a chance to stop myself. Once I slowed down to really taste and enjoy the donut—to taste it for what it is, not based on my memory—I realized I didn't even like the taste. I stopped eating donuts altogether (except for cider donuts from Atkins Farms, which are totally worth consuming with non-judging awareness and joy).
When we bring curiosity to our habits, we start to see their emptiness and can find other ways to take care of ourselves that feel truly nurturing.
Compassion: Understanding the Real Causes
We need to understand something crucial: this isn't a failure of willpower. Millions of dollars are paid to top psychologists to keep us addicted to consumption of what businesses are selling. Our neural wiring is being hijacked by companies designed to override our conscious intentions.
My brightest students—future business leaders—couldn't stop scrolling despite knowing it was wasting their time. They're not weak; they're caught in systems specifically designed to trap them.
Self-compassion involves understanding the causes and conditions of our addictions. When we see the role that businesses play in getting us hooked—whether it's social media companies, news organizations, or substance industries—we can stop blaming ourselves and start reclaiming our agency.
Compassion asks: What are we trying to soothe?
The stress that the cigarette promises to relieve
The boredom that scrolling seems to fill
The anxiety that news-checking temporarily distracts from
The loneliness that substances promise to numb
These are real struggles that deserve real compassion, not corporate exploitation. When we can turn toward our addiction with kindness and understanding, we are more likely to make choices that are better for us. Indeed, I discovered in my dissertation that respondents that had a compassionate inner dialog towards their negative habits were more likely to consume in moderation.
In contrast, self-criticism creates a vicious cycle: we judge ourselves harshly, which makes us feel bad, so we resort to our addictions to feel better, which leads to guilt, which triggers more criticism, which drives us back to the addiction. We become trapped in an endless loop where the very judgment meant to stop the behavior actually perpetuates it.
Self-compassion breaks this cycle by removing the shame that fuels it. When we understand our addictions as attempts to meet real needs, we can find better ways to meet those needs without the harsh inner critic driving us back to the very behaviors we're trying to change.
Energy: Nurturing All Four Rooms
Using the framework from my book, Return to Mindfulness, of "the four rooms"—physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual (intentional) energy—we can start to balance and nurture our energy.
When we're mentally exhausted, we scroll mindlessly. When we're emotionally drained, we might reach for cigarettes. When we're spiritually disconnected, we might lose ourselves in mindless behaviors to fill our emptiness. When we're physically depleted, any escape seems appealing. The irony is that these substances and behaviors promise energy but deliver depletion. We're seeking energy in all the wrong places.
But here's the shift: instead of depleting ourselves further with quick fixes, we can nurture each room:
Physical: Real rest, movement, nourishment
Emotional: Engaging in activities and interactions that are emotionally fulfilling
Mental: Giving our minds actual breaks, not just distraction
Spiritual: Connecting with meaning and purpose
By intentionally balancing our needs in the four rooms we can develop the energy to move with purpose, to make conscious choice.
Appreciative Joy: Finding Real Pleasure
Here's what I discovered with my students: One student using Instagram strategically for business growth found it consistently energizing. When purpose drives usage, agency returns. He wasn't consuming—he was creating.
This is where appreciative joy becomes revolutionary. It's about discovering natural pleasures:
The clarity that comes from not smoking
The energy from eating nourishing food instead of stress-eating donuts (or mindfully eating the cider donuts)
The presence of an uninterrupted conversation
The flow of deep work without notifications
The peace of a morning without immediately checking phones
We need to create new rituals that actually nurture us:
Replace the stress cigarette with three minutes of deep breathing
Transform wake-and-check into wake-and-stretch
Convert anxiety-news-checking into journaling what’s most important to us
Exchange mindless snacking with mindful tea ceremonies (my husband and I are into mushroom chai (tea) that feels nurturing and delicious)
The Practice: Return, Listen, Begin
When urges to consume hit—whether it's reaching for our phone, a cigarette, or the news—we can remember:
Return: Come back to this moment using your breath as an anchor. Just arrive here.
Listen: With curiosity and compassion, what's really happening? What do we actually need?
Begin: Take one small, skillful action. Maybe it's three breaths. Maybe it's a glass of water. Maybe it's stepping outside. Find your way to meet your need in a way that is deeply fulfilling.
For me, this has meant discovering running in nature. When I feel overwhelmed, instead of reaching for a sugar treat, I run. This leaves me feeling so connected with life and empowered that I naturally make better choices through the rest of my day. The difference is profound—instead of the depletion that comes from mindless consumption, I feel genuinely restored.
Your fulfilling action might be different—a phone call to a friend, five minutes of journaling, dancing to a favorite song. What matters is that it truly nourishes rather than numbs.
Our Path Forward Together
This isn't about perfection. It's about progress. Whether we're dealing with substances, screens, or news consumption, we're all learning to meet discomfort rather than consume it away.
We're not failing when we struggle with these addictions—we're fighting against multi-billion dollar industries designed to hijack our brains. Our awareness, curiosity, and compassion are revolutionary acts in a world that profits from our unconscious consumption.
The invitation isn't to be perfect but to be present. Not to never struggle but to meet our struggles with these mindfulness skills. In doing so, we transform not just our relationship with consumption but our relationship with life itself.
With fierce compassion and belief in our collective freedom,
Dr. Shalini Bahl
P.S. If you're struggling with any form of consumption addiction, help is available. Please get professional help. Our Sama Life Circles offer community support. We heal in community, not isolation. And remember—you're not fighting a personal battle; you're reclaiming your mind from industries that profit from your distraction and distress.
Key References:
Bowen, S., Chawla, N., & Marlatt, G. A. (2011). Mindfulness-based relapse prevention: A practitioner's guide. Guilford Press.
Bowen, S., & Marlatt, A. (2009). Surfing the urge: Brief mindfulness-based intervention for college student smokers. Psychology of Addictive Behaviors, 23(4), 666-671.
Duhigg, C. (2012). The power of habit: Why we do what we do in life and business. Random House.
Graybiel, A. M. (2008). Habits, rituals, and the evaluative brain. Annual Review of Neuroscience, 31, 359-387.
Marlatt, G. A., & Gordon, J. R. (1985). Relapse prevention: Maintenance strategies in the treatment of addictive behaviors. Guilford Press.
Skinner, B. F. (1953). Science and human behavior. Macmillan.
A truly enlightening practical article. Thank you!